frangipani_kiss (frangipani_kiss) wrote,
frangipani_kiss
frangipani_kiss

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Retarded Puppy

Been doing a bit of thinking today, as you do when you're slightly hung over and bored at work, and I've come to the realisation I'm too nice. No matter how much people hurt me, no matter how bad they make me feel, I'll always forgive. Someone might push me to the brink of suicide, yet I'll still love them. Someone may make me feel so bad about myself, driving me to an eating disorder, and I'll still forgive. I guess I can compare myself to a retarded puppy. Hurt me all you want and you'll still get unconditional love. Someone may reject me, and yeah, i'll be hurt, but I still love the person. Nick ditched me for an anorexic. I felt fat and like i was not good enough. Yet I still like him (only as a friend though). Paul used to make excuses why he couldn't hang out with me, like he was studying or something, and then i'd find out later he was at Tegan's. I still like him (again, as a friend). Dwayne treated me really great, then said he likes someone else. I felt like shit, yeah, but we became friends again. He ditched me in town last night, and while im a bit disgruntled today, I know that when I see him tomorrow, everything will be all sunshine and rainbows. Cause I still like him. I know people can say something like "just don't forgive", but it's easier said than done. Out of all the people that have hurt me, It's only one I don't forgive. and I don't think I ever will. But many people have hurt me. and I mean really hurt me. But I still like them. It sucks how people walk all over my feelings, probably knowing damn well I'll still be there for them.
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